Pinellas County School Board Clown sign now

We, the undersigned, think it is time to require the Pinellas County School Board to dress like what they are - CLOWNS. We see many advantages to adopting this policy:





1) Meetings would be entertaining to watch. Campaigns would be like a circus (which they are anyway when you think about it).





2) Boas and greasepaint would be a mandatory part of all School Board attire, and no School Board Member could begin a meeting without a boa carefully wrapped around their neck. Other attire could include (but not be limited to) classic clown attire as defined by the Ringling Brothers and Barnum & Bailey Clown College. Flappy shoes are optional, as they might present a workers comp hazard.





3) Any votes taken could be made by nose honking. That in itself would be worth a bunch of laughs. And School Board Members will only be able to address each other by clown nicknames, such as Chuckles or Happy.





4) The Pinellas County School Board could set an example for the rest of the world. Imagine Congress in clown suits. And anyone would pay to see George Bush in a big, fruit-striped clown suit doing pratfalls. His ratings would be bound to improve. C-Span could turn into a pay-per-view channel and begin charging an obscene amount of money.





There is no detriment to this plan. Taxpayers would willingly pay for clown suits and greasepaint. Other politicians would not think any differently of our school board members. After all, everyone already knows that politicians are clowns.





(A special thanks goes to The Lazy Iguana for his unknowing contribution to this petition.)

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Teri HensonBy:
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Pinellas County School Board

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