Pave the Parks! sign now

We the undersigned petition the Congress of the United States to pave the national parks entirely with 3 inch asphalt. Because trees, especially the evergreens, are the true enemy of man and life on earth, we demand that Congress act immediately to remove each and every last one. Because streams and lakes are home to fish, which quite frankly smell and taste fishy, we demand that they are backfilled with black sticky pavement. Because dirt, left exposed for great lengths of time, tends to blow around and adhere to automobiles (our most precious natural resource), we insist that each and every last square inch of national park be sealed with hot tar. It is only in this environment that American families will be able to observe the true beauty of our great land.

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Kathryn ChambersBy:
International PolicyIn:
Petition target:
U.S. Congress

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