Changes For The Betterment Of Blizzard Entertainment's Upcoming Diablo 3 Video Game Software Product sign now

This petition is being made as a way to force Blizzard Entertainment (henceforth referred to as The Party In Question) to meet the exacting standards of the signers and what we expect from The Party In Question's upcoming Diablo 3 video game software.

The Party In Question shall make the following changes to their video game:

The art direction of the game will shift to that of a realistic depiction of human beings, environments, magical spells, and demonic entities.

There shall be 9 character classes: Druid, Barbarian, Ninja, Pirate, Mage, Shaman, Necromancer, Paladin, and Space Marine. All classes shall be available in male and female versions.

The level cap shall be 100 instead of the expected 99 as to make the player feel slightly more accomplished.

The Druid character class shall be able to transform into wolf, bear, and spellcasting phoenix forms. The character class shall also have the ability to summon sharks.

The Shaman character class shall be Trolls that speak with Jamaican accents.

The Pirate and Ninja character classes shall always be flagged as hostile towards each other.

The Space Marine character class shall have unique access to plasma rifle technology.

The Paladin character class shall receive a free Arwing starfighter mount at level 40.

The armor design for all female characters shall be as revealing as possible to increase the visual aesthetics of the game. As a result, all female characters will suffer from a lower armor class but shall receive a boost to their agility from having less restricted movement.

The soundtrack shall feature music from Nine Inch Nails, Rob Zombie, Cradle of Filth, and, Marylin Manson to enhance the Gothic feel of the game.

There shall be a reintroduction of the light radius system as the game world will be stuck in eternal night.

The main enemy, Diablo, shall look even more like the Balrog from the Lord of the Rings movie than He already does.

If The Party In Question chooses to ignore this petition and no implement the aforementioned changes then the undersigned shall boycott all products produced by The Party In Question.

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Kenya WoodwardBy:
SustainabilityIn:
Petition target:
C.E.O. of Blizzard Entertainment

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